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Keys To The Game

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Week 9 – Bills
Was that the most boring game in years? The Steelers scheme was so vanilla they could have put Graeter’s out of business, and yet the Bengals were never a serious threat. The Bengals did not force the Steelers to use any second options, whether it meant changing up their running game, or even forcing Roethlisberger to look for a second receiver. Big Ben completed 19 passes, and on at least 16 of them he only looked at one receiver. Meanwhile, the Bengals became panicked once the Steelers took the lead and never looked like they truly thought they could win. One series summed up the whole game, and that was right before half time. The Bengals had a 10 play 50 yard drive to the Steelers 2 yard line where they faced 4th and 1. Any normal professional team would have been ready for this situation, instead the flustered Bengals called time out with 2:20 left. Let’s see, you are on the opponents 2 yard line, will you need 2:20 to finish the drive? No. Whether you kick the field goal, go for it, call time out, pay for another fly over, or rush to beat the beer line, you do not need 2:20. So Marvin could have calmly let the clock run as far as he could and made his decision. After the Bengals called the frantic time out, they decided to trot out the field goal unit to a smattering of boos from the crowd. Then, following another long kickoff return to the Steelers 33, the Steelers marched down and scored a TD with 4 seconds left in the half. And to top that off, the Steelers first play of the drive was a draw to Willie Parker, usually a sign that you are not going to run the 2 minute drill looking for a score. However, the draw went for 32 yards to the Bengals 35. At that point the Steelers had to go for the score and had no trouble doing it. The Steelers were content to stick with the mere basics, and that was enough for an easy win.

Keys to the Game.
The Bills are a bad team, they have 3 wins and 2 of them have come against the hapless Jets. They have the 31st ranked offense in the NFL and the 30th ranked defense. Their defense is just barely better than the Bengals 31st stanked defense. With that being said, the Bengals were 2 point favorites but the line has dropped to 1 due to betting on the Bills. I have to agree with the betters that the Bengals have not proven themselves to be a consistent or dependable team so far this season, and Buffalo is still one of the toughest road games in the NFL. Perhaps the Bengals could get back on track with a win, but they have officially entered the no man’s land where fans are not sure if we want them to win. There are 6 “should win” games in the remaining 9, so the Bengals could put themselves in position for the playoffs. But chances are the Bengals are not going to fight their way into the playoffs, so winning now only disguises their weaknesses and worsens their draft picks. Every year there are teams that finish on a winning streak that do not make the playoffs, and the team thinks they are primed for the next season(Rams 2006, Dolphins 2005, Bengals all 90s). They forget why they lost 8 or 9 games and that they need major changes in order to improve. Instead they think the streak will continue into the next season and the same problems that doomed previous seasons arise again. Win or lose, this Bengals team needs major changes in order to become a top tier team in the NFL. The only real bonus to this game is that it is the last game without Chris Henry, so some real entertainment should return next week.

When the Bills have the ball: The Bengals defense needs to be completely blown up from top to bottom. The coaching is awful and there are no more excuses to be made. First it was the LB injuries, then the run fits, then the Dline broke down, and against the Steelers it was the DBs turn to blow the game. A poorly coached team has different breakdowns each weak, while a team with injuries or bad players will continue to have breakdowns in the same area. The Dline and LBs played a fairly decent game this week against the Steelers, it was the DBs that allowed the back breaking plays this time. The Roethlisberger heave up for grabs that turned into a 40 yard completion, Hines Ward given a 10 yard cushion, Willie Parker getting to the outside on numerous big runs, and Heath Miller’s 23 yard run after a quick hitter all fall on the DBs. Again, Dexter Jackson made sure everyone knew he wasn’t happy with the people around him. It would be nice if he acted that way when he gets beat by a TE, or when he misses a tackle on a RB bounced out to him. Other than a handful of players: Geathers, Landon Johnson, Peko, the rookies, maybe Ahmad Brooks and Jonathan Joseph, everyone else needs to go, coaches included. When a simple junior high style offense makes you look that bad, everyone’s job should be on the line. The most exciting part about the Bengals defense is watching the different ways they can breakdown each week. I think this week it will be the line’s turn again.

When the Bengals have the ball: While the Bengals offense is not playing at their top level, they are not the reason the Bengals are losing. The offense scored on 3 of 6 drives on Sunday, with one of the failed drives being Kenny Watson’s questionable fumble in the redzone. Scoring on 50% of your drives will usually win games, unless your defense let’s the other team control the clock and score on 4 of 6 drives(Not including the Steelers 7th drive kneeling out the clock). Getting six possessions is very low for an NFL game, but happens when teams successfully run the football and the clock. Against the Jets, the Bengals scored on 5 of 9 possessions which gave them 31 offensive points. Going from playing the #1 defense in the NFL to the 30th defense of the Bills, the Bengals should do fine if they keep their current scoring ratio.
The bad news is it looks like Chad Johnson could become a problem. Since his arrival in Cincinnati, Chad has always been the same player; exceptional athlete able to beat defenders, but not sharp enough to be dependable when the Bengals need him. When things are going well, Chad is free to use his athleticism, everyone loves him and he is the star. But when times are tough, Chad disappears and the team depends on TJ/Chris Henry/Peter Warrick/etc. That has been the case for multiple seasons and it has worked for the Bengals offense. What has changed this season are the rumors about Chad being traded and his actions on the field. Chances are the trade rumors did not come from the Bengals, but from Chad’s agent Drew Rosenhaus who has not been happy with Chad’s contract for years. Chad has received some bad press lately, and its looking more and more like Rosenhaus is going to angle for a way to get Chad off the Bengals. In Sunday’s game, Chad looked uninterested in the game on multiple occasions. On some run plays, Chad was not even looking at the play or lined up in any way resembling a football player. He seemed distracted, dropped a key 3rd down pass, and it looked like he dropped the 4th down pass that was reviewed by the Steelers(The refs did not seem notice clear evidence to overturn multiple challenges on Sunday). Let’s hope this is just a bad game resulting from the pressure of being in a bad run, but if Rosenhaus has his way, the bad times will continue until Chad can be shipped out and negotiate a new contract. Rosenhaus excels at using team press to build a case and get his players new contracts, whether it be positive extensions, or negative cuts/trades. The Bengals need wins and Chad needs to score a few times for order to be restored before the team killing agent has his way. NEXT QUESTION!!

What you do want to see: Chad score and do a TD dance that involves an OJ Simpson or a Buffalo Bill theme.
What you don’t want to see: Winds strong enough to knock out the Bengals passing game. It has happened in the past in Buffalo and would leave the Bengals relying on the 21st ranked run offense, 31st ranked defense, and Ginger Graham. Buffalo is in the top 5 on most special teams.

Matchup of mullets: TJ vs DE Anthony Hargrove
Hargrove does not have a mullet, but the Bills did not have much to work with. It is impressive for a grown man to have a haircut that should be reserved for a 6 year old girl. All Hargrove’s cute twisty braids are missing are colorful clips that reflect his mood or have his favorite cartoon character. BENGALS WIN
Matchup of Moustaches: RB Kenny Watson vs DB Donte Whitner
Whitner obviously knows what it takes to be a champion. He is from Cleveland Glenville High School, played in the US Army Bowl in high school, played for Ohio State, but left early to become a top 10 draft pick. Had Whitner stayed in school, he would have been the safety for the Buckeyes in their National Championship Game loss to Florida last season. It goes without saying that had Whitner and his moustache been on the field last January, Ohio State wins that game by 73. BILLS WIN
Duel of the uglies: QB Jeff Rowe vs. RB Marshawn Lynch
Both players this week are rookies bringing their ‘A’ game to the NFL. Lynch gets extra points for having one of the best post game celebrations in college football history. He has just enough this week to top Jeff Rowe:


Too bad golf carts do not idle so that Marshawn could Ghostride Da Whip!!! BILLS WIN

Bonus Feature: The Bills also have OG Brad Butler who looks like a fat Carson Palmer.

Battle of old men: DE Bryan Robinson(33) vs TE/FB Ryan Neufeld(31)
Neufeld is in his 7th season in the NFL. In his career, he has 1 rush for 14 yards, and 13 catches for 129 yards and 1TD. He is the definition of a pure blocker and special teams player. Being that he is the oldest player on the team shows the youth movement going on in Buffalo. Not counting kickers, Buffalo has 13 players born before 1980 on their roster. Neufeld, more like Oldfeld..LOL!! LOL!!! BENGALS WIN

Biggest loser fan:
Stormtrooper/Darth Chinstrap vs Mark Miller


Upon further review, Mark Miller is not a loser, he is awesome. I wish I was going to this game in Buffalo just so I could tailgate with Mark Miller. And what is Gary's problem in asking stupid questions to our man Mark? Landslide victory for the Stormtrooper and Darth Chinstrap as biggest loser fans. BENGALS WIN

Trashiest looking cheerbabe: Rhonee vs Stefanie of the “Buffalo Jills

All of these answers are not from Stefanie, but most of them are so I will go with it.

Personal Motto: Keep your face in the sunshine and you will never see the shadows.
Actually, you won't see anything because your retinas will be torched.

Most prized possession: Not sure?
Not sure what? That you have a favorite? That you have possessions? That you believe in possessions? That you understand the question? That you know where you are? Notice, the answer "not sure?" is a question and not a statement. Maybe her question is meant to spark an existential debate.

If I could change something about myself: My hair would be way longer!!
Man I hope she can make those difficult changes in her life.

Best advice I ever received: Don’t make faces because it will stay like that.
Are you sure? I thought the advice went: Don't make feces on yourself.

I'm proud to be: Where I am today!
How deep? Wasn't it Descartes that said, "Cogito, ergo sum" -- I think therefore I am?

Personal Motto: "Live life as if it's your last with NO REGRETS"
Wow, she is deep. She is into multiple dimensions of beings and realities. But she is motivated to live THIS life as if its her last. I too would pick the life where I am a cheerleader to live as my last.

Something I always wanted to learn:How to fly a plane.
Please let me know when that happens so I can live in a bunker.

Little known Bills fact: The combined age of the Bills owner Ralph Wilson (89), General Manager Marv Levy(82), and Head Coach Dick Jauron(57) is 228. To put that in perspective, Bengals senile owner Mike Brown is 70 years old; Multiply that by 3 and get 210. It’s no mystery why the Bills go toe-to-toe with the Bengals, Texans, Dolphins, Raiders, and Saints for worst run franchise in the NFL. I am not advocating age-ism, euthanasia, or even the abolishment of early bird specials, but when a game is now dominated by younger players, it helps to have personnel people that weren’t already collecting Social Security when current players were born. The Bills roster has 48 players born post-1980, and the guy managing the personnel was born in 1925, the same year as actor Jack Lemmon. Jack Lemmon, by the way, starred in the movie Grumpy Old Men 15 years ago. Levy is also older than Angela Lansbury of Murder She Wrote fame, Sammy Davis Jr., and Fidel Castro.
Bills new front office:
Head of Player Security and Background Checks.


Head Talent Evaluator -- Sammy Davis Jr. is actually deceased, but our girl Stefanie will channel his energy.


Quarterbacks Coach and Offensive Dictator



6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Strong work.

Drew

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I saw you guys on sports illustrated. I have a new favorite bengals site.

Do you guys go to all the away games also?

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i really enjoy reading your blog, but as a steelers fan i want you to know that the vanilla ice cream is especially sweet with 5 Super Bowl rings on top. maybe if you stay away from Long Island and are a really good boy this year, Santa will leave Bill Cowher under the tree for you this year.

 
Blogger Number 1 Fan said...

Hey, by us saying you beat us with a Vanilla offense is by no means a cut on your team. We posted a pathetic game on bith sides of the ball and Vanilla is all it took to beat us.

With some health and players back in a few weeks, we look forward to coming into Pitt at 6-5 and handing you your ass.

Thanks for reading.

 
Blogger Number 1 Fan said...

And to the question about the away games, I wish we could. We were at the Cleveland game and will have a report from the Buffalo game. But other than that, our asses will be in a chair somewhere in Cincinnati.

 
Blogger Number 1 Fan said...

And,

I for one, don't want the chin as our coach. I am still behind Marvin Lewis.

 

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